Ending relationships can be devastating for both the parents and the children involved. The process of leaving a partner becomes more complicated when children are involved, and child visitation plans are often put in place to ensure that both parents spend adequate time with the children.
Visits are extremely important, but this is also where many people diverge and conflicts arise. However, to make the process less traumatic for children, many child visitation attorneys suggest making efforts to make visitation time successful. For this to happen, both parents will need to accept the fact that the children involved will have two separate homes in which they should feel comfortable and safe.
Facilitate visits
Parents should go the extra mile when it comes to visits, making the experience a positive one for their children. Some of the ways this can be achieved include:
- Try to stick to a routine schedule so children are prepared for visits
- Help children meet other children to foster friendships in both homes.
- Making sure children have a personal space in each home
- Be open and communicate with the parents of your children
- Treat everyone involved with respect.
- Be flexible when it comes to hours
- Give each child involved individual time
Be respectful to the former partner
Conflict may be unavoidable when it comes to two different people, but conflict can make children feel caught in the middle. Instead of reacting to negative emotions, an experienced child visitation attorney would suggest setting them aside so that the visitation does not affect the relationships between the children and the parents. Some of the ways you can show respect include:
- Arrive on time for children’s visitation plans
- Inform former partners of changes in routines or lifestyle, such as a romantic partner
- Sharing other changes, including phone numbers or jobs, with former partners
- Realize that changes in visitation are necessary as children get older
- Let ex-partners know where children are during visits
what to avoid
There are also a lot of things you shouldn’t do if you want to have smooth visitor exchanges and make sure the kids are as happy as possible. For example, you should avoid:
- Passing divorce-related messages through your children
- Holding Children Responsible for Visitation Plans
- Using children to spy on ex-partners
- Fighting or arguing with co-parenting partner during exchanges (drop off and pick up)
- Making children feel guilty about spending time with or loving a parent
- Withholding visitors for reasons other than the parent being a genuine threat
- Let activities interfere with visiting time
There’s nothing easy about navigating child visitation and working with your ex to raise your children, but with effort you can make things a lot easier. Remember that your child comes first, so make sure they always stay safe and happy. Be respectful and do not allow stress or tension to escalate conflict, as this could negatively affect children.